I do a fantastic job at shoving all of my stress and problems into this box already packed full and overflowing with my stress and problems. But I do this so I can absorb all the stress and problems of everyone around me. I am a stress shamwow. The human stress shamwow. Soaking up stress that doesn’t even pertain to me one mental explosion at a time. Once a year, typically around the same time I have my own gigantic mental implosion of terror. I lose my mind. Everything goes flying and I can’t handle anything anymore. My box explodes, my human stress shamwow explodes, it’s a nightmare.
Picture someone juggling 42 grand pianos that are lit on fire and someone else throws a flaming chainsaw at them. That’s my life. I am juggling 42 grand pianos that are lit on fire and someone finds it amusing to throw a flaming chainsaw at me. I’m sure it’s very entertaining for some people, but to me it’s a living breathing nightmare of epic proportions. But that’s the life I signed up for I guess. So feel free to keep throwing flaming chainsaws at me, I’m sure I’ll manage not to drop them.
