Toxicity in Friendships

I have begun the process of setting up healthy boundaries within my friendships. I tend to have a lot of one sided friendships with toxic people. I am very blessed with a small circle of people I can share my life with, ask for advise, and just pray with. I am also cognizant to be the friend that they need too. When they need me, I always try to be there. With coffee, with a listening ear, with a shoulder for them to cry on, with a hug, with prayer, whatever they may need, I’ve got them, I want to be there for them, and I do my best to be there for them.

Unfortunately there are so many one sided friendships that litter my life. Hence the implementation of boundaries. I realized I was beyond drained day in and day out because of these friendships. And not just that, but the amount of negativity and toxicity in these friendships was causing me to stoop down to a level I was not okay with for myself.

God calls us to love everyone as He loves them….but boundaries are healthy. I do not need to devote my life to these people, and I do not need to continue to be close friends with them if they are constantly gossiping, trying to get me to hate someone they hate, or cause strife in my relationship, as well as monopolize every single conversation. How To Set Boundaries was a great resource for me as I began the journey of setting boundaries with these specific people. I highly recommend reading the Practicing Loving Detachment section. I think I might actually write about that in the future because I could fill up an entire book about practicing loving detachment.

I don’t need to constantly save them from themselves or be a listening ear to the never ending negativity. But I can choose when to see them, and I can choose to attempt to be a source of positivity and love in their life. So as I embark on this journey of boundaries and loving detachment…I will do my best to be a source of Christ’s love while also protecting myself.

 

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